When I Grow Up...

During an impromptu class activity on careers, I remember some kids in my 5th grade class announced that they wanted to be a:

A. Fireman
B. Policeman
C. Lobsterman
D. Nurse
E. Bank Robber
F. Vampire

Had I known mythical creatures were an option in this exercise, I would've chosen Werewolf without hesitation. However, in considering actual monetary compensation, I declared my goal in adult life to be an Illustrator. (ODA also has proof of her artistic desires at a young age.) While others excelled in sports or bullying weaker classmates, drawing was my sole talent. I eventually learned to use it to distance myself from said jocks and save myself from the bullies ("Surely you'd rather have an original drawing of Chewbacca than the pleasure of pummeling me on the playground, right?")

My hero at that time was legendary "concept artist" Frank Frazetta (made popular by his Molly Hatchet album covers). This, no doubt, was one of my early avenues into heavy metal music - but, more importantly, it also served as my introduction to art.

It started with generic animals and cars...


Then, the drawings progressed into characters, mostly Conan the Barbarian types, or

in-depth graphic novel series not-so-loosely based on Star Wars or Battlestar Galactica.

Between the ages of 8 to 13, I drew all the time. I skipped gym class and hung out in the art room. Eventually, my phys-ed teacher decided to take advantage of this strange delinquency and said he'd pass me if I drew a picture of his new house. I did. My science teacher got so frustrated with me doodling in his class, he hired me to illustrate his nature column in the local newspaper. Later, the paper did a profile on me entitled "Young Artist Puts Imagination on Paper."

I simultaneously blame/thank my high school art teachers for spoiling my potential career as a famed fantasy artist. Instead, I was taught to channel my creative energies into still lifes of plants or pinhole photos of parking lots or lopsided ceramic bowls. Then, the pretension of art school took hold. Video Art was in, Fantasy Art was out. One one hand, I might be making a lot of money doing creature design for some animation factory in California today. On the other hand, I could still be living with my parents, sketching Hellboy wannabes in my basement bedroom.